So, who the hell do I think I am? Why am I on altscene.com?
And, am I, essentially, getting a free crowdsourced analysis?
Excellent! I feel this is going to be more fun than I can shake a hex topped stick at!
Are you sitting comfortably?
Sooo, O.K., I would say my musical/cultural epiphany was hearing "Dominion" by little Andy Eldridge for the first time at the tender age of 14 which was...well, it was a somewhat cathartic experience.
Have I really been listening to the same bloody record since 1987?
There was, also, the added bonus of accompanying images of Patricia Morrison in a black P.V.C. basque which had a profoundly emotional, spiritual and metaphysical impact upon the imagination of an adolescent schoolboy detained at an all boys Benedictine Public School in the middle of rural Somerset!
To be honest I'm not entirely sure how much, if any, developmental progress I've made in the intervening 29 years, except that I take myself, and life in general, even less seriously than I did then, just with much more self-assurance, confidence and I'm long past giving a s**t about the opinions and judgements of the mediocre and conformist, though I'm not entirely sure whether that's a good thing all the time.
Blah, blah, bah, me, me, me, pout, selfie, yak!
O.K. a serious bit, I "like" thinking, reading, intelligent conversation, silliness, radio (mainly (R6 music, R4 & R4 extra), "Just a Minute", Scrabble (especially with the 50+ point (depending on a consensus of how funny/puerile it is) bonus rule (that I made up because I can't spell for toffee) for things that are, sound like they are or, if you can convince the other players that they really should be, rude), spontaneity, anything penned by Douglas Adams/Eric Blair/Aldous Huxley etc. in fact most things not penned by E. L. James (sorry but I could only force my way through 2 pages of the dire, unimaginative drivel, give me the insanity of the Marquis De Sade any day), learning from everyone and everything, new experiences, monkey tennis, adventure, discovering strange treasures (especially in charity shops), cooking, eating (try anything (not actually deadly) once!), music, theatre, art, movies, open-mindedness, honesty, The James Last Orchestra (oops!), nature, laughter, beauty, knowledge, wisdom, ALDI berry tea, essentially I just endeavour to live a fulfilling, good and happy life and then, eventually, "lay me down with a will".
And dislikes? I think this can be most easily encapsulated by saying absolutely everything that is, relates to, is culturally identified with, has ever been mentioned by, shares its values with, been in the same time-zone as, (and it truly pains me to type this)...."R&B", my fingertips feel truly sullied.
I have no preconceived, idealised and unattainable physical "type" so long as you're comfortable in your own skin.
Thank you for reading this far into my inane wittering and if you're intelligent, funny, independent, extremely tolerant, long tempered, honest, genuine, kind, have mammary glands like space-hoppers (optional) and feel that you've exhausted all other avenues I'd love to hear from you. Carpe deum/noctum, Ben.
P.S. I'm afraid I'm really not looking for "wasters" as I lost too much precious time being one.
P.P.S. I am slightly embarrassed by my profile photo', it really wasn't as contrived as it looks and it's the only one I have.
