ORGANIZED CHAOS87

I wouldn't know how to summarize who i am. I don't believe in conforming, I dont care about what society says is ok or right or wrong I just care about what is. I play guitar/vocals and write all the music. I've had opportunities to suceed when I was 20, but life had just begun f**king me I'm surprised I'm still alive i was an almost cliche tormented front man. I haven't been ables to play in almost 2 snd a half years I've need plastic surgery bc an injury on the subway. Im finally ready to get back to it but not a 20 year olds angst that's mild compared to a grown mans built up anger. Even though I've calmed down a lot and I'm ready to start living again but without the chaos bc before life imitated art and the art was about only really the pain in my life. I am emotionally scarred so please be good to me. Mentally though I'm an old soul , as level as they come. I feel like I failed a lot of younger people who looked up to me and expected the next kurt Cobain but I had my own hell to deal with snd now that I'm getting it together I plan on pursuing music again and doing whatever I can to prevent anyone from goin through what i did. I'm looking for a best friend to get serious with and experience life together. My age honestly does scare me. Even though I'm more together than ever I always told myself i wouldn't have to grow up , mentally I've been more mature than most since i was little but at heart I can be really young. Im s Scorpio to my core . I like strong women so of course she can lean on me when needed, im super sensitive and empathetic, I need someone sensitive enough to get my pain. Trust me it's worth it what I've been through has given me depth and wisdom that goes to waste with a lot of the fakes around. I've suffered alone for so long that I need someone to understand and have the strength to let me lean on them for once and lighten the weight I carry. I am very deep , poetic, romantic, but I'm also funny and can be lighthearted. Im VERY smart so at least some intelligence is a must. I've said enough talk to me to find out more